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Saturday, July 21, 2012


A few years ago, I bought a belt. I loved it. It had studs and sparkles and was just as cute as cute can be. I bought the biggest size they had (in a plus size store even.) I got home, went to put it on didn't fit. :( It was too small. The biggest belt in a plus size store was too small. I basically fell to the floor in my closet and just sobbed. There is something very defeating about trying on something in the largest size from a plus size store and having it be too small for you. I think that was kind of a turning point in my life. You'd think it would have been a "I need to do something about this" turning point, but it wasn't. It was exactly the opposite. It was a "there is no way I can ever come back from this" turning point. I pretty much gave up on ever being thin again. How can you change when you're so big that you don't even fit in plus size accessories?

Well, after losing 22 pounds (STILL at 22 pounds...ARGH!) my pants are falling down. It is getting embarrassing. I have to walk around holding my pants up. I don't want to buy new pants because the plan is to not be staying in any size for very long. :) So, I needed a belt. Well, I have the biggest belt I could find hanging in my closet. It's still studded and sparkly and just as cute as cute can be. However, the memory of how defeated I was when I first tried it on was right there in the forefront of my mind. What if it still didn't fit? I've been working hard to lose this weight. What if I try on the belt, it doesn't fit, and I give up again? Why does this inanimate object have so much power over me?

Well, I gathered up my courage, went into my closet, grabbed the belt, put it through my belt loops and...BUCKLED IT! IT FITS!!!  Granted, I'm on the first hole in the belt, but that's a whole lot better than it was when I first bought it. Plus, now my pants don't fall down! Double score!

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