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Tuesday, July 24, 2012

Pinterest is EVIL

I must remember not to browse Pinterest when I'm hungry...or on a diet. Seriously. Everything there looks SO delicious. I swear that 75% of the things my friends pin are food related...very often dessert related.

For instance, I just pulled a super easy banana bread out of the oven. It's after midnight. Why am I baking? Well, because I saw it on Pinterest and thought, "I have all of those ingredients! I should make that!" So, I did. It smells delicious. I'm not eating any. It makes me a little sad. Not as sad as being fat makes me, though, so I'll continue to resist the temptation.

I'm still stuck where I was a week ago, weight wise. I know that as far as plateaus go, it's not a big deal to be at the same weight for a week, but only four weeks into my diet? I'm bummed. Granted, I haven't been following things exactly as I should. I had way too many calories when I had those meatballs, so I didn't have my dinner shake that day. Yesterday was my son's birthday party. I had a bratwurst. It had 270 calories. So again, no dinner shake. I'm fairly certain that's not the way you're supposed to do it, but the thought of putting even more calories in seems wrong. I know that Isagenix isn't about losing weight, it's about cleaning your body of toxins and becoming healthy, but right now, I'm just focused on the weight loss.

I will, however, say that my self esteem has improved dramatically in the last 3 1/2 weeks. I've been married for fourteen years. As I've said before, my husband loves me no matter what. He thinks I'm gorgeous. However, with how ashamed I've been of my body for the past 8 years, I've hidden it, even from him.  I don't like him to see me change, it's lights off only during *ahem* that time, etc. Our new home (we bought it about 10 months ago) has a pool. When we purchased the home, I purchased a swim suit. Since we bought the house, I had gone swimming with Allie (my 5 year old) a few times, but would never go swimming when anyone else was home. My children have asked me many times to go swimming with them, but I always come up with some excuse or another. Really, I just don't want them to see me in a swim suit. Even my husband couldn't get me to go swimming. Me? In a swim suit? In front of him? I don't think so. I don't even wear shorts because I'm embarrassed by my fat legs and the stretch marks on the back of my knees. I just started wearing capris and short sleeves this summer. That was a HUGE step for me. It was always jeans and 3/4 sleeve shirts. So, the thought of wearing that swim suit in front of anyone, even my husband, was horrifying.  Since starting Isagenix, I've gone swimming with him not once, not twice, but THREE times! Granted, they were at night, in the dark, when the kids were all in bed, but I did it! I'm even contemplating going swimming with my children soon. I may have to buy a new swim suit though, because the one I have is getting too big!

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